One of the first personal development books I ever bought (the Magic of Psychic Power!) had a number in it that shocked me so much that I have remembered it ever since - 25,500. That, according to author David J Schwartz was the average number of days someone lives. (Life expectancy in the developed world has increased; in Japan it’s now around 82 years, near enough 30,000 days)
When I first read that figure, aged around the age of 20, it seemed such a small figure. Now 30 years - or 11,000 days - later I’m rapidly eating into my allotment, if I’m lucky enough to get an average quota.
The film American Beauty has a nice twist on the famous poster quote:-
“Remember those posters that said, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life?” Well, that’s true with every day except one: the day that you die….”
In the chapter of Schwartz’s book, he further illustrates his point by saying that every day 5500 Americans die (it’s a generally cheerful, uplifting book!). Without dwelling on that statistic, few of us like to contemplate that our death is as much a part of life as our birth. “No one gets out alive”
Another perspective I often use, is to to say that today - December 31st 2008 - will never happen again. When its gone, its gone. Sure, you’ve got 1st January 2009 to look forward to (hopefully) and 31st December 2009 - plus the days in between. But why waste today when you won’t have it again?
Steve Pavlina has a very good post on goal setting, well worth reading the whole thing. But towards the end he has this quote:-
“I was once told by someone that I should end each day by crossing it off my calendar and saying out loud, “There goes another day of my life, never to return again.” Try this for yourself, and notice how much it sharpens your focus. When you end a day with the feeling that you would have lived it the same if you had the chance to repeat it, you gain a sense of gratitude that helps you focus on what’s really important to you. When you end the day with a feeling of regret or loss, you gain the awareness to try a different approach the next day”
If we’re not careful, we don’t notice that the days are passing us by. We take the paths of least resistance, sticking within our comfort zone. We watch TV all evening rather than learn skills that will help us advance. We put up with unwarranted criticism, we passively submit to requests rather than assert our needs. We allow a lack of confidence to pass up on an opportunity.
Lacking self confidence can be a barrier to making the most of life and enjoying the moment. If you are hesitant in your ability to achieve something, you may never start it. Low self esteem casts a negative shadow on your opinion of yourself. Even if you do things you have a low opinion of what you have done, and get no pleasure from achievement.
Looking back over the past year, or even the past week, its by doing things and stretching myself that I feel I have made the most of my days. Or as the quote from Steve Pavlina says, I would live it the same way if allowed to repeat it. But, to use another cliche, life is not a rehearsal - there is no replay button. Moreover there is no erase and record again facility!
I finish today, and this year, with a question I have recently read on FreetheDiva:-
A bank credits your account each morning with £86,400. It carries over no balance to tomorrow. Every evening you lose the balance you failed to use during the day. What would you do? (I converted the $ to £ as the pound needs all the help it can get at the moment!)
Well most people would withdraw every penny they could before they disappeared, and invest them as best they could. Yet everyday we are credited with 86,400 seconds, which disappear when the day is over. Most of us squander those seconds, let them slip by as if we have a limitless supply. Remember, if you fail to “invest” them, its your loss.
I wish you all the best for 2009 - make the most of all 365 days.
我曾經買過的一本在描寫個人發展方面首開先河的書(心靈能量的魔力!),書中的一個數字深深地震撼了我,從那時起我便記住了它——25500,據此書作者 David J Schwartz所述,這個數字是人活著的平均天數。(在發達國家,人們對壽命的預期值有所增加;在日本,大概是82歲,將近30000天)
當我第一次看到這個數據時,作為一個20歲左右的年輕人,對我來說是多么小的數字。如果30年過去了或者是11000天——之后我將很快的耗費掉我的生命,如果我足夠幸運的話,可能也會獲得人均壽命的額度。
電影《美國薔薇》在其著名的海報宣傳語中運用了一個相當好的寫作手法:
“記住海報中所說的,‘今天是你余生的第一天嗎?’是的,每天都是如此但是除了一天:就是你離開這世界的那一天...”
在Schwartz 的書中,他告訴我們每天去世的美國人有5500個(這是一本令人振奮的書),以此他進一步論述了他的觀點。如果沒有對數據進行詳細的統計分析,幾乎沒有人愿意將我們的死亡看做是生命的一部分,就像我們的誕生一樣也是生命的組成部分。“沒有人能活著離開這個世界的”。
我經常用的另一個觀點是,今天——2008年12月31日——不會再來一次。當它逝去的時候,它便永遠的離我們而去了。當然,如果今天是2009年1月1 日,你也許會充滿希望的期盼著2009年12月31日的到來——無論是其間的那一天。但是如果時間逝去不會再有,為什么我們還要浪費掉無數的今天呢?
Steve Pavlina 在目標設置方面發表過一個非常好的帖子,很值得我們一讀。帖子的尾聲是這樣描述的:
“有人曾告訴過我,當一天過去的時候,我應該從日歷中把它刪除然后大聲的說,‘我的生命又逝去了一天,而且不會再回來了。’不妨自己也試試,然后留心下它會讓我們的關注度增加多少。當一天結束的時候,如果你覺得要是有機會重來,你會用相同的方式來度過的話,你會充滿感激,而這份感激會幫你更加關注生命中對你而言真正重要的東西。當一天結束的時候,如果你覺得后悔或者迷失,你便會有意識在第二個黎明到來之時去嘗試一種不同的過法 ”
如果我們不在意,我們不會留意到日子在一天天的逝去。我們選擇的道路上布滿最少的阻礙,安逸的呆在我們舒適的環境中。比起一些能讓自身提高的技藝,我們卻選擇整夜的看電視。我們忍受不應有的指責,我們被動的服從要求,而不是坦言自己的需求。我們因為不自信而拒絕機遇。
自信心的缺乏會成為你大部分生活的障礙,也會阻礙你享受生活。如果你覺得你的能力在達到某目的方面不夠自信的話,你就不要選擇開始。自尊心的缺乏會對你自己的觀點籠罩上一層消極的陰影。如果你沒有認識到自己所做之事的意義所在,即使是成功了你也不會從中獲得任何的快樂。
回頭看看過去的這些年,或者僅僅是過去的一周,對于你所做的事和你所做的努力,你覺得已經利用了大部分的時間。或者正如Steve Pavlina 所說的,如果可以重復來過,我會用同樣的方式度過。但是,用另外一個俗語,生命是沒有預演的——它沒有重播按鈕,它是不可刪除的,在它的世界里也不存在可以重錄的設備!
帶著一個問題結束了今天,今年,它是最近我在FreetheDiva上閱讀到的一個問題:
銀行信貸記錄中你的賬戶每天早上都有86400英鎊。到明天就沒有多少余額了。由于白天的使用不當導致你的收支不平衡。這時候你會怎么辦?(我將美元轉化成英鎊,是因為在這時候強烈的打擊急需所有能得到的幫助!)
大部分的人都打算在錢消失前盡量撤回每一便士,然后以盡量好的方式做投資。每天銀行貸款給我們的時限是86400秒,當一天結束,這些時限也到期了。我們中的大部分人都會浪費掉這些時間,就像我們有無限的供應一樣任由這些時間從身邊溜走。切記,如果你這里投資失敗,它就是你的損失。
2009年我致上我最好的祝福——希望大家充分利用所有的365天。